Secrets of 24: the entire series is about Bauer killing everyone. Shhh!

It's Monday. It's January. And 24 is still not back. Damn you network television for not coming to terms with the writers and forcing me to read about one of my favorite shows.

Last year I received word about a new book coming out called Secrets of 24: The Unauthorized Guide to the Political & Moral Issues Behind TV's Most Riveting Drama, which is a long title made all the more glamorous by the action word "unauthorized." That makes me think the book went on the set and tortured people for answers.

But that's hardly the case. The book is an ally of 24 and includes interviews with the show's creators, Scowl face (Mary Lynn Rajskub), Tony (Carlos Bernard and Old Man Buchanan.

Bernard's is probably the most revealing interview since he talks about coming back in Season 7. When asked if he knew something like this would happen after he DIED in season 5, he responded "Well, We knew it was left open for a reason."

OK, that wasn't revealing at all.

Actually the more crazy quote comes from Dennis Haysbert saying "They killed me for the sake of ratings." Hey now!

It's insightful to hear from the cast and creators of the show, but more interesting than that are society's intellectuals squeezing philosophical and political thought out of an hour-long show with the crazy premise of one man saving the world in 24 hours.

There's commentary from Maureen Dowd ( columnist from the New York Times who claims we don't need men) Michael Chertoff (Secretary of Homeland Security) Tom Clancy (guy who writes ridiculously long, convoluted political thrillers that I refuse to buy) and Sarah Vowell (blogger and contributer to This American Life).

That's awesome. They had bloggers contribute to the book. I guess they knew I was too busy or drunk to do anything constructive on 24.

But as books I didn't contribute to go (and there is a fair amount), it's an engaging read and helps frame world politics and moral issues using examples I can understand. Even more crazy is an anecdote about military personal going to the set to talk about toning down the torture scenes because new recruits were convinced that it's a viable technique.

It isn't a perfect replacement for the show, but it helps frame the series you're addicted to a little better, but it will only make you miss the series and cause you to wonder if the show will ever return. As for me, once I'm finished with Secrets of 24, I'm going to put the book to good use and take advantage of the hard cover when I get roped into a street fight.